Changes
by O'Im Only Joking
Summary: Err... Ste is still dating Noah and of course Brendan wants his twink back, can he get him?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Yeah, erm, I'm not sure why I've wrote this. It's basically just a boring babble about nothing; Contains miniature spoilers. **

**Set around March/April. (2011)**

**WARNING: Mentions of, Noah. Only mentioning him, he's not actually in it. But I thought it best I warn you sensitive loveys first. ;)**

**Song: **_**I Knew You Before by Dustin Kensrue. **_

**Enjoy x **

_Oh, and all I can say I knew you before_

_You were beautiful back then_

_Before you grew up, before you gave in_

_And all I can say is I knew you before_

_You were beautiful back then_

_You could be beautiful again._

Brendan's showed his face tonight, I should really tell him to go but its fine. Really, it is. I'm with Noah now, he's great.

He gives me all the things I want in a relationship. He gives me all the things Brendan won't. Okay, I'll change that to _can't_. There's times when I'm sure he tried, but then he'd go back to his old routine.

It was fun. He made me grow up, he made me stronger. He changed me.

But, here we are now, sat anxiously. Him blowing into his coffee every two minutes but not actually drinking any of it, probably best; it'll be flat cold by now and me playing with the fabric on my t-shirt.

We've not spoke properly since February. So much went wrong for all involved, but I never blamed Brendan for it. There were times I'd snap at him and he'd just take it, then there were times when I thought I'd pushed him too far; expecting smacks that never came.

I guess we've both grown up in our own way.

The silence is deafening, we've spoke one word each 'Hey' and even they were mere mumbles. I stand up and turn the stereo on to activate myself:

_You dream of sharing your heart_

_Instead you share your bed_

_And your heart beats empty and cold_

_With all the tears that you have shed._

'So…' Brendan finally croaks.

'Noah, how is he?' He asks coldly.

What does he care? He's done the odd stuff regarding, Noah, these last few weeks but I've just looked past them. I'm not going to say they've been the nicest of things; like Brendan making Noah lose his job, but I can't draw myself into things with him again.

You may ask what I'm doing letting him come into my house now, this could be seen as 'been drawn back' to him. But this isn't like that, I wouldn't let it get there and I will tell him how it is from now on. No more games. No more lies. No more secrets. It's about me, Noah and the kids now.

'Great thanks.' Of course, it's not meant to make him jealous. He _really _is great. I like him a lot, me.

'How's Mitzeee?' He laughs a little and shakes his head.

'We are like two peas in a pod me 'n her.' He claims. Yeah right.

It's all for bloody show, he must think I've forgotten that bit of information.

'Right, what do you want, Brendan?'

He places his mug of cold coffee onto the table and claps his hands together.

'Come and work back at _ChezChez_.'

It's not a question; it's more of an order. Cheeky bastard.

'What? No, I'm working for Tony now.'

'Multi-tasking, Stephen, ever heard of it?'

His mouth twitches up slightly as he waits for an answer.

'Thanks, Brendan, but no, if that's all you can go now.'

I don't look at him as I get up off of the chair and lean over to get the wasted drinks. He grips at my wrist; the familiar feel of his touch brings back memories in a flash. I will not let this happen again. I can't.

'Brendan' I try and warn him, my voice is too weak though.

He lets go of me but his eyes are fixated on my face, it's like he's glued me to the spot and I can't move an inch. He sniffs at me; how I've missed that… no, stop it Ste, I tell myself. All this is over and for good.

'You're a not the Stephen I once knew.'

He whispers, hmm's every word that leaves his mouth. But I'm confused; I'm not any different to when we first met… not much anyway.

'I haven't changed at all.'

He bites his tongue and tilts his head slowly to one said as he says;

'Noah's not worth your time.'

How as he got the cheek? I wasted half of my time waiting around for him; I think it's fair to say Brendan isn't worth my time.

'Go now.'

The mugs in my hands click together; my hands are shaking. He looks down between us and he takes them from me and puts them back down.

He holds on to my fingers as his thumb soothes over them. Don't let him do this, Ste.

'You nervous about something, Stephen?'

I shake my head and pull my hands away from his touch.

'You're wasting your time, Brendan. I am not interested in anything you have to offer me. So, please, just go.'

He pushes his bottom lip him pretending to be deeply hurt.

'At least walk me to the door.'

I tit at him as I walk towards the door; he stalks behind me. We get to the door and he steps up right behind me and places his right arm to the door, I turn my head best I can to the side, his body feels rough against mine; its heat instantly coursing a stir inside me.

'You know,' he whispers in my ear 'it's been hell not having you around.'

'I'm not going back to _ChezChez_.' I breathe. This is not turning me on. No, no.

He raises an eyebrow.

'I'm not talking about work, Stephen.'

He could have had me all to himself from the get go, but as it was, he couldn't give me what I wanted.

'You had your chances.'

He brings his face closer to me, his nose and moustache tickles my neck as he kisses me gently. Why is he doing this? I will not fall for his tricks anymore.

His touch lingers on my skin as I close my eyes; this is so very tough; fighting him off of me. But I can do this; Noah is what… who I want.

I turn around and push him off of me, he staggers back as he look at me confused, hurt.

'I can't do it anymore, Brendan!'

I open the door and push my hands in my trackie bottoms; my hands beginning to sweat. He walks to leave and turns to look at me, his finger coming up to my chin to look at him. His features are soft and he looks close to tears, but he's not into all that soppy shit, so what do I know?

'I _will_ get you back.' He says simply.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Well that's the last time I follow spoilers. They are forever cutting and editing stuff, I hope it doesn't affect the story too much. **

**The first chapter was rushed, so I apologize for errors that were there. :/ But expect more poor grammar and what not. **

**Thanks for reading and reviewing, it's much appreciated. **

Walking back home I know I need to make some changes. I'm used to wee Stephen been putty in my hands and when that no longer happens you know things need sorting.

Can't stand him been with anyone else, let alone another man. Noah? Seriously, he might be a nice fella, but he isn't me. Stephen can say that he wants him, but there's a need for me that he has, I just know it because I feel the same.

Yeah, it sounds soppy, and I seriously don't like sounding like a pansy, but that young lad has changed me and I guess I knew way back when I got rid of Danny boy, I mean I… murdered someone, I took someone's life. I took it because I couldn't bear the thought of Stephen in pain.

I never really felt guilty for lashing out at Stephen, yeah it was wrong, but he did things to me back then, things I couldn't explain. He intrigued me, he looked up to me, and he wanted my encouragement. I worked on him so well, controlled him like a doll, treat him like shit, but he always came back to me.

And now I don't have that. I don't have that knowledge of him running back to me and I don't have the courage to trick him back in to my bed whenever I please.

Because that's what it was always about between me and him – sex. A bit of fun, danger and excitement, then things got a lot deeper. He became more irresistible, more sure of himself; he knew what he wanted, he had his mind set on it, he wanted us to be a 'proper couple' who 'shared things', but I couldn't give him that.

Now he's found someone who can give him that. And it makes me think that it can't be that bad, surely? I've been through some shit times growing up, things I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, but then again, I am my worst enemy at times. There's a reason for everything I believe, I just haven't found out what yet.

I can threat over these things; I always do, there's so many things that are there to wined me down; Pete, Macca, Oileen, Danny, Rae, Amy, Mitzeee, Warren and Noah. All of them from my past, present and future, and none of them look set to budge. I'm fucking Brendan Brady, the 'local nutter', the local drug dealer. But there's more to me than that, there must be.

Cheryl, the beautiful, baby sister; doesn't have a bad word to say about me. Granted, she doesn't know half of the stuff I do and what I have done. She may have a rose tinted view on me, but I'm her brother and I do love her, genuinely. She brings out a much calmer side to me, a playful kind. That side to me that lets her know I'm there for her through thick and thin. She's part of my family; I care deeply about what she thinks of me, always have done. She can act a bit dim sometimes, but she's a strong woman, a Brady trait I guess. Warren is a fucking sleaze ball, he makes my skin crawl, and Cheryl deserves 10 of him. Though I guess she's like me in that respect, she isn't aware of how much she is worth.

Mitzeee, with three E's I can't forget. Oh Ann as I prefer to call her, so much front that lass, she is scared of been judged, likes to have a reputation, she's firm, sets rules, feisty and she knows what she wants… sort of. We are so alike, I allowed her to blackmail for god's sake, that's how worried I was of been judged. She was worried, too, though, thought me been by her side would make her look good (and of course she was right, just look at me) but there was more to it than that. She wanted to be liked, she wanted people to support her and respect what she was doing, and I was a perfect placement. But then she got needy… meeting her Ma? Horrible situation, hated it. Then she fell for me, and I felt for her, I really did… I kinda wished, well I willed myself to feel the same but it didn't come; we could have worked if we lived in a different universe. Now she's on to her new target, bloody Foxy. I'm just waiting for the right moment to come to put him firmly in his place, because it will come; if you hurt my baby sis you automatically fuck with my feelings.

Stephen. I'm so confused about this lad; I just can't work out how we've got here. Cheryl, Warren and Mitzeee are easy to understand, easy to manipulate if the mood takes you, but Stephen, nah there is so much more to him. I know part of my…like for him is the fact we are so alike. We both have our demons; he just seems to work with his a bit better than me. We have kids, he adores his and I adore mine, he's told me on many occasions that he would do anything, and that rules set for me too with my own. I feel the need to look after him, I actually enjoy looking after him and it means more to me than just actually having a bit of an hold over him, it actually makes me happy that he allows me to do it, when he's not been stubborn, that is. We've both been through shit patches whilst growing up, he's opened up to me about his past so many times, he's done it to show me it's okay, but it made him so vulnerable. I hate been like that, I'm a man who has grown to look after himself, and when you open up to someone it means you need someone there to help you through it, but that isn't me. But I realize I've got to try, I need to try and do this.

I need to let myself understand that it's okay to want help, if it's needed. I just need time to get there.

Putting my key into the boor door I enter my home; Cheryl sat at the table reading her latest fashion magazine.

'Hiya love.' She grins up at me.

'D'ya want a cup of tea, Brendan?' She asks about to get up from her seat.

I have to do this now, I tell myself. I'm a man.

'No.' I stretch my arm out and point her to sit back down with my finger. 'Just listen.'

She looks at me, confused. I throw my coat over the back of the sofa and sit facing her.

'What is it love?' She asks nervously.

'Me and Stephen…'

She opens her mouth as though she's about to say something but doesn't. Stop acting like a fucking pussy, Brendan I scream in my head.

'We've been… you know, sleeping together.'

She sighs loudly as she leans back into her chair.

'About bloody time! I know I'm not the sharpest tool in the box, but my god, you two were obvious as day.' She laughs.

'Do I look…gay?' I still despise that word, leaves a bitter taste on my tongue. Makes things sound sordid, makes me sound sordid.

'Oh, Brendan,' she smiles leaning forward to hold my hand 'you don't look anything, you're just Brendan, my fabulous brother.'

'Ste's a lucky guy.' She finishes.

But then her face falls as she remembers;

'Isn't he with that… Nick?'

I breathe, frustrated as I nod my head.

'Noah, yeah he is… I think I've messed up big time sis.'

'Oh babe. Really, who'd choose a guy called Noah over you?' She gives me a warm smile.

Any guy that treats him right I think.

'How long have you and Ste been seeing each other anyway?'

I look to the side as I try and remember.

'Since October, but we've been on and off, ya know there have been so many setbacks, what with Rae, Mitzeee and me playing the hot and cold games.'

'October? I didn't think it was that far back love, but you can't blame yourself for this, you're always so hard on yourself.' She claims, tapping my hand playfully.

'But I have fucked it up, why do you love me so much, Chez?'

I sound like a right girl, asking all these questions… telling her about me and Stephen. Asking her stuff like why does she love me, but for some reason I feel the need to know. Like she will give me a final push to make what I am doing okay, like it's kinda… normal, whatever that word means.

'Because you're a protector, ya know you have a heart, Brendan. You're a strong bloke and you've always been my perfect brother. Plus, you're a gay; that's always a bonus for us sisters.' She says jokingly.

I give her a smile... I'm Brendan though, I like sleep with a man; I don't want labels been thrown at me.

'Here, give me a hug' She gets up and offers me her arms. I hold on to her tightly as I realize it wasn't all that bad, I should have known she'd have been okay with it all.

And most of all; I don't feel as though the earth is about to crack and swallow me whole.

She lets go of me and strokes me cheeks with her thumbs.

'I should have known something us up with you, but I've been so wrapped up with Warren I didn't notice you'd been down lately.'

I shake my head;

'I'm a grown man, Chez. You know me, I don't need help.'

She sighs, disappointed at me. Knows I'm lying.

'Everyone needs a bit of help Bren, it doesn't make you any less of a man. In fact, it makes you more of one.' She grins.

'Go and see Ste.' she chirps.

'I've been to see him, he's not interested.'

She rolls her eyes at me.

'Brendan, babes, of course he's still interested. You've just gotta fight for him, you've got to show him that things have changed this time. If you want this, you will find a way to get him back.'

I nod my head in agreement, I do want this. I do want him. I can jump over these hurdles that are stopping me from doing what I feel. I need to do what I want, it might not sit well within my head just yet, this all sounds gibberish to me what I'm doing and speaking, but my heart is fully aware of what I'm feeling.

'Love you, sis.'

I grab my coat off of the sofa and make my way to Stephen's.

'Brendan,' she calls 'these leggings go with the shoes, don't they?'

She flaunts off her ridiculously high heels and gold leggings; the room is soon filled with laughter as we crack up; one step at a time woman, Jesus.

I open the door and I hear her say the words that are really going to change my life from now on.

'You go get your man babes!'

**A/N: Hope it wasn't too OOC. I did try! **


	3. Chapter 3

I tidy up my bedroom, full of Noah's used socks and undies. He's messier than Leah and Lucas, he says there are more important things to worry about than tidying up, and I agree, but you should see the state!

I know I only live in a grubby council flat but me and Ames have a bit of pride, we've always kept it tidy. It wasn't really an issue at first, found it sweet actually, but then he started eating in the bedroom; leaving dirty cups and plates on the floor, he laughed it off when I confronted him about him, and I guess I came across like a miserable git so I let him off.

He's pretty lazy too, I know he keeps fit but apart from that he can just sit on his arse and do nothing. I think it's mostly down to him living with the 'lads' for a month or so, he now does it out of habit.

But I've learnt to put up with it cause I like him, and he likes me. We get on well and he treats me good and the sex is pretty good an all; very different to my previous experiences, different to _him. _

I sling a pair of his trainers to the side of the room, a little bit heavy handed than needed. Brendan, again just _there_ somehow finding a way back into my way of thoughts; everything seems to creep back to him.

And it bugs the hell outta me. I don't want to be reminded of him, but it's like my body is telling me he belongs there. Like I know it's wrong so that makes it right. He could be an arse sometimes, but he's done so much for me. He has a front, a mask, just stopping him from showing people how he can really be. Because I feel, in my heart, that I've seen the real Brendan, the one that lets you in – not with words, but with his body, his eyes, and the way he used to caress my body.

I didn't want him to change, not completely. Of course not, the sad to him is what made me fall for him the first place. He filled me with excitement, he made me feel like I was important, and he drove me wild in every way possible; when I asked him to accept us – to stop been ashamed of me, I meant for him just not to be scared anymore. I kinda wanted to look after him, wanted to be there for him all the time, like he had for me. I wanted him to realise it was okay for me to love him.

I hate myself for not been stronger, I didn't understand at first. I thought I couldn't _love_ another man; it didn't come natural to me. But the fact is, in the end, it felt no different; he was still a human being, he still had feelings. This was just proper mad, I did try an' stop myself… but I couldn't.

But anyway, that don't matter anymore. He is my past and I have to move on now. He had his chances and blew any hope we had of been together.

My phone beeps from the kitchen and go in to see who it's from. I smile as his name pops up:

1 message, Noah.

_Missing you dude, I'll treat ya to your tea tonight. C you soon. ;) xx_

I jump as I hear a growl behind me, what the fuck.

He just stands there like him been in my home is normal, well it isn't! I shake my head completely puzzled at his appearance.

'How do you keep getting in here?' I ask pushing my phone in to my pocket. 'I told you this morning… I'm not interested.'

'Hmm, I think you will be.' He says completely sure of himself. 'I'm magic, Stephen, yer know me, full of surprises.'

'Why is everything just a big joke to you?' I ask, in no mood for his games.

'Don't be like that.' He smiles at me. He looks…cute as hell, yes CUTE.

He takes off his coat and suit jacket and sits down.

'Make yourself at home why don't you.'

He pats the chair that's placed at the side of him and I go over. I am prepared to listen, yeah I'm an idiot but this feels different. Like it might be something I'm going to like for a change.

'You're going to have to send Noah packing.' He says breezily.

Okay then, maybe I'm not ready to listen to this rubbish. Get rid of him? I'm not sending him anywhere.

'Ya what? I'm not 'packing' him anywhere.'

'There won't be enough room if he stays.'

What is he talking about?

'Brendan, you're not making any sense.'

He puts his lips and strokes them with his finger.

'I'm moving in…'

He's what? I don't understand at all, I scrunch my face up at him.

'Unless you move in with me and Cheryl, you probably won't want to leave the kids though… we'll have to think about this, Stevie boy.'

'Brendan,' I say slowly 'please, for your own sanity will you stop talking in riddles.'

'Me and you. We're gonna give it a go, and if it all fucks up you're to blame.'

I shake my head. He is acting so cool about this, how can he? After everything, after this morning, how can he think things can work after a few hours? My heart beats loud in my chest though, 'me and you, giving it a go'. There's nothing more I could ask for, but this is Brendan; it will be no different.

I stay firm as I try and form my words correctly.

'We aren't giving anything a go, Bren. Nothing is different from what I said to you this morning, I'm with, Noah, and you will just continue to live a lie. And that's fine, but I no longer wanna be a part of it.' I finish on a breath.

He tenses up at my words, like I've insulted him. And I suddenly feel guilty…like I want to take back my words, but like everything else, it's been done and I can't.

'I told Cheryl.'

'Told her what?' I'm not playing dumb; I just don't want to get the wrong end of the stick.

'What do you think, Stephen?' He asks frustrated at my question.

'I'd like you to tell me, please.' I give him a smile.

'That me and you have been seeing each other.'

He mumbles, like he always does when he's worried.

'And?'

'And Stephen, she already bloody knew! We can't have been that obvious.' He thinks.

I laugh; I knew this wasn't too hard for him. I told him that Cheryl would understand, I guess he was worried about everyone else though who's in his life.

'Nah, I don't think we were. But we could have been if you'd of let us.'

'You know what people are like, Stephen. They read too much into things, twist things, it's their word against your own.'

'I know that, but there are worse things than been gay.' I comfort him with by stoking his arm, I know he needs support.

'Not for me, that's what you don't understand. I hate been… queer, it just doesn't fit with who I represent.'

'It doesn't make you any different!'

He sighs.

'It makes me look weak, puts me in a box with all the others.'

'No, it really doesn't. You still scare the shit out me sometimes and I know the _real_ you. Nobody will care, Brendan.'

I laugh a little to let him know I'm trying to joke.

'I don't mean to scare you.' He says, serious.

I nip my tongue out; I never know how to word things proper.

'All I'm saying is that you can still be hard man, Brendan Brady, and people will not care less about who you sleep with, and if they do it's probably because they're jealous you won't put out to 'em.' I grin.

He looks at me, makes my cheeks burn.

'You have a wise head on those shoulders, Stephen. I knew there was something I liked about you.'

'I learnt from the best.' I smile.

He takes my hand. We sit there for a while not saying a word, both our eyes fixed on joint fingers.

'I'm bad for yer, you know.' He grumbles.

'You've gotta stop thinking like that. I'm not perfect, ya know. I've made plenty of mistakes.'

He looks up rolls his gum between his front teeth his tongue.

'You're perfect to me.' He confesses.

I chew on the inside of my cheek as a smile presents itself. After all this time he still makes me feel the best.

'We gonna give this couple shit a go then? He asks leaning forward.

X

We lay together in silence. Limbs tangled together; sweat cooling, breathing getting back to normal, smiles on faces, bed sheets sticking to skin. Yeah, okay we've found our self's back in bed together. But we made love, actual love. I could feel it, everything was different. Brendan was different, brilliant all the same, but different.

'It stinks of dogs in here.' Brendan says, sniffing the air. A bit disgusted.

'Oh, that'll be Noah's socks.' I say looking up at him.

The name hangs in the air, slightly ruined the moment. I speak quickly.

'I'll finish with him later.' I promise him.

'You better; I knew he was wrong for you.'

'Brendan, don't be nasty.'

He strokes my arms, and he suddenly leans up from beneath me and leans on his elbows.

'Don't tell me you've been working out?' He squeezes my bicep.

'Just a bit, Noah thought it be a good idea.'

He rolls his eyes and shakes his head.

'Urgh, I love your chicken arms. Don't you go changing 'em.'

I laugh gently as we lay back down.

'What else as he made you do? Stopped you from putting too much salt on your chips, or fed the kids nothing but vegetables.' He moans.

'Ya not far from the truth actually.' I confess.

'Well isn't he a barrel of laughs.'

'He just wanted us to be healthier.' I say playing with his chest air.

'As soon as we can be arsed to move I'm gonna make you a big, fat greasy full breakfast.'

'Brendan…'

'Mmm.'

'We don't have any of that stuff anymore; it's all fish and red meat, and some rice stuff.'

He laughs.

'HA! What a prick.' I slap him, 'sorry Stephen, but is this guy serious?'

I nod my head.

'Jesus Christ, I should have saved you sooner.'

I smile up at him.

'Yep, you should. But you're here now.'

He leans forward and fits his lips between mine. His thumb strokes over my cheek as breaks away slowly.

'So when can I move in?' He whispers.

'You already have.'

He pecks my forehead through a smile as I lay back on his chest; the light soon turning to dark as I fall asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**Warning: Contains Noah! **

**Also, for the benefit of this story Amy is living at her dads, and Rae is living with Doug and the 'lads'.**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing. (: **

'I'm gonna stay with you whilst you tell him.'

Stephen's pacing across the living room, he's shitting his pants bless him. I don't know why he's letting this get to him; Noah's a waste of space anyway.

'You don't have to; I don't need you to hold my hand.'

I raise my eyebrows.

'You sound like me, Stephen. Anyway, you can't kick me out of me own home.'

I laugh. It sounds so weird, like it's not actually happening, and in a minute I'm going to wake up and realise it was all a dream. I've got my man back, my wee fella.

I watch him relax a tad as he lowers his arms to his sides.

'Are you sure this is what you want?'

'Hey, come 'ere.' I beckon him over with my arm.

I lean against the back on the kitchen side as I hold him close, by his waist. He scans my face with his, his eyelashes looking longer than ever as he blinks. Utter beauty this boy, what the fuck was wrong with me? I had this person, this soul all to myself and I just couldn't acknowledge. I lean forward so our foreheads touch.

'Of course I'm sure.'

And I am, for the first time in years I am sure this is right. There's still a little bit of adjuration in the back of my mind, but that's normal, right? Years of lying, hurting, hiding, running and now I know that this thing, whatever it is, has pulled me to the right place. It's pulled me to Stephen; we work in our in little, mad way. Fucking hell, I'm turning my stomach here. I need to get a grip; this emotional bollocks is all down to young Stephen.

He grins up at me and reaches up to kiss me. His soft lips slotting between mine, his head turning to the side to deepen our kiss, his tongue piercing through the gap of our mouths; I would grant him his wish but we need to stay focused, damn, am I really turning sex down?

I pull away and his eyes open again slowly.

'If you want, you can go get your stuff from Cheryl's? Or pick the kids up from nursery?'

'Stop trying to get rid of me, it's too early for the kids anyway, isn't it?'

He looks up at the clock on the wall, 10:45.

'Yep, I just don't want to rub it in his face.'

'I promise I'll be on my best behaviour.' I grin.

And I will, because it's what Stephen wants. If I had my own way I'd batter the shit out of him, given how he's tried to change Stephen, and coming in this place like he owns the place; granted I've done it a few times myself, but this fella is a nobody. Urgh, just thinking about him makes me sick. And, to top it off, he's had his hands on my man, the person that belongs to me… he's actually invaded his perfect body, done shit to him. I shudder as I try and rub away the thoughts and images in my head.

'You okay?'

'Yeah… yeah, is he always this late?'

Just then the door shuts, and I stand by Stephen's side.

'Just breathe.' I whisper as he begins to rub his hands together in awkwardness.

'I'm back babe!'

Babe? Another reason to despise this fella.

'Oh, hey Brendan.' He smiles at me, looking miffed as to why I'm here.

He kicks his trainers off and leaves them in the middle of floor, bloody hell, this guy needs a slap.

'It's over.'

Stephen blurts out.

'What is?' Noah asks getting out some pasta. Pasta? Who eats that shit?

'Us.'

He turns around to face us, yeah he looks hurt but he doesn't belong here, doesn't belong to Stephen.

'I don't understand.'

'It's not working, Noah. I want you to leave please.'

'But… I thought we were going strong.'

Oh, I can't stand it.

'Look…mate, me and Stephen are together, and you are no longer welcome here.'

He places his hands on his hips on the defensive.

'You and him? I should a' known.'

'I'm sorry, Noah…'

'As if you two will last.'

Cheeky bastard, I know I said I'd behave but he is really starting to grate on me.

'I don't wanna fight with you, please. We can still be mates.' Stephen try's with a small smile.

'Oh, save it. We had something, Ste, something this… creep can't give you, but if you can't see it then fine. I'm worth more than that.'

And with his little speech he heads to the bedroom to pack his stuff. How dare he call me a creep, he doesn't even fucking know me. I feel my fists clench as I eye up the bedroom door.

'He's got a right attitude.' I spit.

Stephen turns 'round to face me, his eyes looking tired. He's too soft this lad when he wants to be, where's that strong side to him he shows he as when he fought against me? I suddenly loosen my hand back open and realize that that no one is just that; a no one. Stephen is what I will focus on.

'I feel bad.'

'Don't, it had to be done.'

He smiles up at me and flings his arms around my neck.

'Thanks for been here.'

X

We go to the nursery to get the kids, I've only had one encounter with Lucas, and I suppose it wasn't on best terms. Scaring both Amy and Lucas, looking back now it was a stupid movement on my part. It's very rare of me not to think about what I'm doing, but that was a moment where I wasn't thinking.

No one bats an eye lid as me and Stephen wait for the kids to leave the building. Every other parent/guardian just paying no attention to two men waiting to collect ones kids', I don't know why I'm surprised. I clearly just thought that people would have been looking at us, whispering and pointing at the way Stephen's broad smile looked up at me every other second. Cause he can be a bit in your face, can Stephen. I've had to warn him a few times about it, thankfully he's calmed it down a lot.

Stephen tells the kids that I'm moving in. They of course don't seem to care. But Leah points over to me with a confused expression on her small face.

'That looks silly.' She giggles.

She reaches up that bit further and prods at my moustache playfully. I smile down at her, kids eh? Cheeky little mites, but you'd be lost without them.

'Leah, leave Bren alone.' Stephen warns.

'I…I'm only playing daddy.' Leah sulks.

I look over at Stephen and smile.

'It's cool, really.'

'I know, but they can be a bit of a handful.'

Leah's soon toddling off to play with Lucas. Squawks and car noises are made as Lucas runs his toy car over Leah's dolls. I look down at them and smile, my eyes becoming blurry as I think of my little ones back home.

I feel Stephen's hand against my arm.

'Everything okay?'

'Yeah… just thinking of my little ones, well they aren't so little anymore, ya know? But I don't half miss them.'

'You should go over and see 'em. It'll be nice for the lot of you.' Stephen advises.

'Yer right, I'll sort it out when I get time.'

My tone sounds a bit off. I'm not ready for Stephen to meet my family back home, it's not needed anyway. He wouldn't like it. I feel my phone vibrate and retrieve it from my trousers.

_1 new message: Cheryl._

_Where u got to love? Not heard from ya since lst' nite, I take it things went well? Get in touch, all me love Chez. Xx_

'Who's that?' Stephen asks trying to have a look.

'Cheryl wondering what's happening, we off to go tell her the news?'

**A/N: Not really happy with this chapter, but I'm not in the best state of mind after the last few episodes. Brendan's in my bad books, along with HO! **


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Sorry I took a while to update. Hope it is okay. **

**May be OOC, but that's nothing new for my stories, is it? :-P **

**Enjoy! **

With the kids now with Amy for the weekend we can now go and tell Cheryl the good news. Amy weren't best pleased with me taking Brendan back, she's never liked him, but she's not the one dating him – I am. She'll have to get used to it because I'm not changing my mind, me.

Brendan stepped up and voiced how this time around things are different; he's different. And you could tell he was telling the truth, the words just jumped out of his mouth, he probably wasn't thinking about what he was saying, but I like that. He's for ever thinking 5miles ahead, his brain always ticking over.

Amy was still unsure, didn't trust him staying at the flat with the kids. I jumped straight to his defence and explained to her that he would never put our kids in danger; he knows I love them with all my heart. He looked confused that Amy wouldn't trust him with the kids, but with what happened with Lucas that time I could see where she was coming from… but that was the past.

This time it's about the future. Mine and Brendan's future, like a proper couple; the couple I wanted months back.

We say our goodbyes as she takes them to a taxi. Brendan offers her the money for the fare, but Ames doesn't accept. She thinks he's looking down on her – that she's a charity case – but Brendan was clearly just been…nice.

X

We walk to Cheryl's, a comfortable atmosphere, but I can tell Brendan's wary about something. I turn to look up at him.

'What's the matter?'

'Nothing, I'm cool.'

I notice him look around the village, regulars everywhere, and it becomes clear.

He doesn't want them to see him with me. I stop at the bottom of the steps that lead to Cheryl's flat, my stomach turning in little knots as disappointment and anger rise in my body.

He turns around, already half way up the steps.

'C'mon then.' He says carrying on back up the last few steps.

'No.' I shake my head. I sit down, my cheeks heating up. Taste of salt running over my lips. I wipe away rolling tears and fold my arms across my body.

I feel Brendan come to the side of me.

'What's all this?' He whispers.

'When I said I wanted things to change, I meant it Brendan!' I exclaim a little too loudly between sobs.

He taps his bottom lip with his finger as he shakes his head.

'Keep ya voice down, Stephen. Everything _has_ changed…'

'No.' I force myself to breathe, 'you still don't want to be seen in public with me.'

He laughs at me. Disbelieve etched on his face.

'Yer can't be fucking serious? Where are we now? In public, Stephen things will take time, but you've got to stop talking shite.'

'I can tell! I'm not stupid… the way you look around to see nobody's watching us, and look at you now,' I look between the huge gap between us on the step, 'ya can't even sit close enough to comfort me!'

He grunts as he moves closer to me and grabs me into a firm grip. My head resting on his shoulder, his arms wrapped over my arms and back. He makes me feel warm and my sobs quickly fade away. He still holds me in place, his hand rubbing up and down my back.

'This is stupid, Stephen. I…I know it seems like that, but things will improve. This is new for the both of us, let me find my feet. Can you imagine me doing this months… weeks ago? I don't think so.'

I wipe the wet mark from Brendan's leather jacket.

'I'm sorry.'

'So ya should be. Do you know how much this cost me?'

X

Cheryl claps loudly in front of us. Her teeth shining as she grins happily at the news.

'Aww boys.' She flings her arms around our necks and pulls us in for a hug.

I can't help but laugh shyly as she lets us go; Brendan obviously warning her with a look that says 'what did I tell you? Don't over-react!'

'Ste, you don't understand. My poor brother was so upse…

'Err, sis. Put the kettle on, yeah?'

She looks at him and beams as she turns towards the kitchen area.

I smirk as I turn towards him. Naturally I put my hands on his hips, he raises an eyebrow and smiles back.

'You were upset?' I ask gleefully.

'Ya know what she's like, Stephen. She sees things that aren't there.'

I stick my bottom lip out, that always works a treat.

'Okay… I may have been a little… annoyed. But I defiantly wasn't upset.'

I shake my head, I know he's fibbing.

'Whatever Brendan.'

I let him off with a cheeky slap to his arse.

'It's the truth. Don't get all cocky, Stephen.' He warns jokingly.

I can't help but be playful.

'But I thought you liked my cock?' I whisper, my tongue wetting a little bit of my bottom lip.

It's proper not the best place to try and seduce him, what with us been in Cheryl's company, but there are times when I just can't help! And maybe the fact that I get off on it.

He places his finger over my lips to 'shh' me. We sit down at the table as Cheryl comes back.

'Ta sis.' Brendan blows his coffee.

I smile a thank you as I warm my hands with the hot drink inside.

'Have you been crying love?' She asks curiously.

'Oh,' I rub under my eyes as I feel embarrassed, 'I was just having a stupid moment.' I tell her.

'Brendan, you best look after the poor lad. Making him cry already? You've only been officially together for 48 hours!' She winks at me.

'Oi! Don't blame me, I will look after him.' He tells her before turning to me. 'I will look after you, ya know that don't you?'

His eyes look across my features and I know he's gonna be there for me. I nod my head and smile.


End file.
